Heb's Son

If I sit down and attempt a formal story I will never do it.  I have only just begun this past summer to begin to grieve the death of my son.  He died April 28, 1978.  I had never heard of meningitis.  He was 15 months old. Healthy and strong.

I thought he was teething then maybe he had the flu.  He was fussy in the morning, developed a fever, and wanted to sleep. By late afternoon he seemed too lethargic and weak, obviously he had more than just the flu or teething.  My doctor was out of town. I went to a clinic in the small town we lived in (pop.900) only one doc.  I didn't know him he didn´t know me.

When he examined him he said "just give him suppositories get the fever down."  I told him I felt it was more than this could we please do blood work. He said no the labs are closed.  He seemed to sleep all night.  Coma in the morning. Took him to hospital early am.  Never regained consciousness.  He died before noon.  In the aftermath his name was never mentioned as my husband would become threatening to the doctor.  Because of this there were no visits to the grave and he was never mentioned again to my three year old son who wondered what happened to his little brother.  No pictures were ever out in view.  In 1997 I was separated and within a year I visited the grave and have begun a journey of healing.  Long and painful. I began counseling this summer and attended a support group for grief that a local funeral home sponsored.  Not long enough though.

I have never even been able to (emotionally) research exactly what this disease is.  I would so much want to understand what happened to my little boy so many years ago yet right now it´s like it´s happening right now.  I decided to search the internet for some understanding of the disease and your site was a link I came across.  I know that cases seem to have increased since the 70´s.  It´s good that people are more aware and can recognize the warning signs.  I even thought of sending for his medical records to read them.   I did have another son in 1980.  My three year old son at the time is now 27 and will not discuss this with me.  My hope is that he will find help in his grieving.

Sincerely,
Heb Harvey

 

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